andy scharf is a BA

Kenny Scharf: More,Newer,Better,Nower,Funner! from Levi's Film Workshop on Vimeo.

He's been making (documented) art since 1978, I hope I care that much about anything when I'm his age. I don't have anything of my own to post so that's mainly why it's there.
I've been reflecting I guess, and socializing kind of. I started a much needed RL painting today. feels good. My tablet's been making me lazy and it's handicapping my growth via myself not putting enough effort into the things I make with it. It's experience but still, I don't want to cheapen myself completely. Also a while ago I witnessed a popular artist blatantly rip off one of my favorite artist's earlier work, and completely get away with it. it kind of got me paranoid about my own integrity and work. People ate that shit up. And it's completely disheartening. I mean almost all art is a replication of other art. as is music, film, whatever. Originality is hard because everything is diluted with influence and to create something that's truly never been witnessed before is near impossible. Anyways, that'll always nag at me, but there's little to be done about it so all I can do is watch my own actions and make sure they don't compromise my principles. That's as close to a solution as I'm going to get.

I just went for a walk and it smells like bad nostalgia outside. It got me wondering why in retrospect shit smells like gold. I guess the human brain doesn't have the capacity to make you feel the pain you once did. Mental scars and muscle memory, but nothing physical; nothing you don't readily adapt to. it's all just bittersweet and childish reverence. Like anything else, much more appealing from afar. I'll probably in the future look back fondly at this moment in time right now. People just don't like being in their own shoes. It's stressful and uncertain, but you learn as time goes on that things will never be better than they are in your current situation (barring extreme circumstances). You'll never be as youthful, you'll have more serious responsibilities and definitely worse problems.
the wise choice is to soak it up
but the conscious choice to "soak it up" forces you to acknowledge the fact that things are getting worse by the day
.. which is actually pretty discouraging
and by this point you've long since ruled out reverting to blissful ignorance
shit what did I just do